Skip to main content

Doomsday To Do List - So Much To Do, So Little Time



As you've no doubt already heard, today is the end of the world so if you have any unfinished business to attend to, get moving and get er' done. One thing's for sure, it's not like we didn't have any warnings about the inevitable coming of the apocalypse. Signs were everywhere.


Still not convinced ? If you were an almighty power and gave your creation free will to take all the beauty you've given them to go forth and enhance life on earth and harness the wonders all around you and the best we come up with is this:


Wouldn't you cash in the chips and move on to something else too? Still not convinced ? How about this:


Granted - he is amusing but holy cow, where the hell do we go from here ?!?! So again, the end is literally around the corner so here's a list of things to do (or not to do) in lieu of the coming destruction.

1. Don't pay any debt. (Why bother?)
2. Run with scissors. (What's the worst that can happen, you're gonna die anyway)
3. Tell the neighborhood bully he's an idiot. (Even if he beats the crap out of you it will only hurt for a few hours)
4. Tell your office mates you're the one secretly passing the silent but deadly ones. (You think they're going to care at a time like this?)
5. Call you're cable company and order all the premium channels. (If you're gonna die, may as well have an awesome selection of viewing options)
6. Use real butter. (Seriously, you're going to worry about your cholesterol now ?)
7. Order and actually eat a baconator. (After eating one, world's end won't come quick enough)
8. Mix your recyclables in with your regular garbage. (No amount of recycling will save us now)
9. Rent a Ferrari and drive the bajeezus out of it. 
10. Do something really stupid.......... but what ? 




In the event that the world doesn't end, do not attempt anything on the previously mentioned list. They were only suggestions anyway. Yup - it's over folks. However you choose to spend you're last day on earth, hope you enjoy doing it and if at all possible - Keep It Retro !











Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Retro Heatwave Video of the Day - Hot In The City

People say that relentless heat can mess you up in many ways. It can make some people nauseous, dehydrate you, give you a headache, make you drowsy or in some cases, it destroys your ability spell ! I'm not bying itt thoughh. I thunck thets a lode of crips.  Yup, it's been a pretty hot one this week with temperature records being broken, hydro grids being strained to the limit and people with air conditioning suddenly having friends over unexpectedly. You can actually buy a raw steak and cook it on your dashboard during the drive home.  While some would say this heat wave is a result of global warming, others say it is the coming of the end. I just think it's a great excuse to hear a great summer retro classic !  

Evolution of the Coke Bottle

There is no logo in the world that is more recognizable than the Coca Cola company's flagship product. Coke and its classic bottle design are a symbol known all over the world. It's gotten to the point you don't even need to have the word Coke in an advertisement as long as the distinctive bottle shape is there somewhere in the image. The classic shape has evolved over the last hundred years and has gone from a rather boring square shaped bottle to the curvy silhouette it now maintains. Below is a timeline picture showing the changes over the years . The shape is also responsible for designers of other products to be inspired by the sexy elements of the bottle, most notably  car designers. there are many examples but one of the best is the 1968 Corvette. The evolution of the bottle continues with many commemorative issues produced for various promotions but one of the latest trends was the availability of metal bottles as well.  There is no doubt the bottle will...

Retro Music Producer of the Day - Arthur Baker

One of the driving forces in early hip hop and Electrofunk was DJ / producer Arther Baker. Starting as a club DJ in the early 70s, he began experimenting with the new electronic sounds of the day and began producing remixes on analog tape. Long before digital took over, to create a quality mix required skill and patience since most of what you were doing was pretty much live. You needed mad skillz back in the day not like these days were software downloaded for free can create a remix on a whim. Though you may not have heard of him, you certainly have heard his work since his collaborations include artists like Afrika Bambaataa and the Soul Sonic Force, Pet Shop Boys, Cyndi Lauper, Hall and Oats, Bruce Springsteen, David Bowie, ABC, Nenah Cherry and New Order to name a few. He was actually responsible for taking an obscure, instrumental piece from a 1984 New Order album "Lies, Power and Corruption" and churning it into the now classic Blue Monday.   His style was easil...

New Site

Just a heads up, the blog has now moved to a more modern WordPress site over at https://retroguyswonderland.com   Site is up and under slight construction. New posts coming soon!   - Retroguy's Son (The SysOp)

Vintage Ads From A Simpler Time - That Are Sexist As Hell

In a previous post we covered retro ads from a simpler time that were among the creepiest I've ever seen. (Click here to see that post) Let's now take a look at some ads that were done in a time when it was considered a man's world and women were here only to serve men, be a perfect wife, do all the house work, try not to do stupid things and always be fresh and pretty regardless of what they were doing. We all know that not only does such a Utopia not exist (I'm kidding ladies) but in retrospect, the people behind the creative direction of these ads really missed the mark not only conceptually but the ad wording (or copy in technical terms) is just plain awful. Clearly, these ads were designed by men, written by men, sold by men and bought by men. "Husbands admire wives who keep their stockings perfect." I love how this ad implies that being married is no reason for a woman to let herself go and should always look her best. Especially since the guy took th...